Dear... ex best friend. I'm so so happy we're strangers again. Sometimes you made it really difficult to me and I couldn't recognize myself. Could you be reading this letter as I'm writing it ? What would you think of my honest words of relief ? Maybe you feel the exact same, how ironic. I didn't know my freedom depended so much on your earnest apology. It was liking we were drinking poison, dirty water from the same glass, and you knew it, and, still, you didn't had the guts to stop it. I, with my usual people pleasing habits, just couldn't stop drinking that poisom, even though I knew it might get me killed. Well, not killed-killed, but soul-killed. Trust killed. So Ill just say goodbye like strangers do. Kind regards seems to be the new see you later for us. And that for me is like a first breath every day.mmm

Dear... comrade,how have you been all this time? good? busy? are you happy? do you feel the tension between us? i sometimes wonder, if i may was in love with you. but i never was to express. did i expect you to be homophobic? i am not sure why. i guess, friendship and lesbian feelings sometimes overlap. well, now i do not ask that question anymore. we are slowly seperaterating. in order to find each other again on other planes of friendship, maybe? or to recognize that there is none left behind? 

Dear... future me. I hope you won't regret what is happening now. I feel overwhelmed by all the things that are going on, but somehow, at the same time, I feel stuck in time. I remember to think that one day i shouldn´t stay at the same place for long, but I hope I am still gonna look hella cute when I am old. Getting old is like putting a new clothe I strangely already recognive the smell and know the measures.Sometimes I dont like this new clothe..it is very heavy and I am getting slow...

Dear...mother, it took me a too long time to understand you. As a writer once said, you're an ocean I'm made out of. And I can no logner distinguish the water we were living in. It's hard for me to face how, most of the time, I can't see where you end and i begin. Daughters may resemble their mothers, but why the other Way Around seem to be such an impossibility for you or, what's worse, such a bad thing? In the end we go back to our mother placenta...our universe 
Mom, I miss you, but sometimes I think we're better apart. It's easier Time, we need time so we can be together one day... Do time heals all the wounds? Or do time only passed and didn´t knew? I now like beans, you know? 

Dear daughter, I wish we were more alike.

Dear... me as a little girl who was completely lost: it was worthy to grow up, now I can take care of you 
Dear me right now, even if you don't feel like it sometimes you're still exactly where you wanted to be so keep going.

Dear...children of my memories, wild wild you all are. The days were passing fast but the valued mark of this early chemistry has stained us all deepy.
I hope you will remain in me, I hope you've molded the crevases of my blossoming.

Dear work, 
why do you keep taking peoples lives?

Dear... ex manager, why you were so narcisist? Why were you so afraid of working together? What do you think your children  will be? Why do you hate women so much? Every morning I walked in with a sense of anger followed by compassion, but then anger again, as soon as you opened your mouth. I could see it in your eyes as well: a piece of cold meat for every woman in the office. The night after quitting the job I had a dream: your frozen brain rolling down the hill till a group of rats

Dear... ex ex ex, we could have had a great time together, I hope you are having it now, no regrets. I'm no longer flooded in sad thoughts or deepest sorrow. I understand now I'll always love you. I will always love you because we grew up together. First loves have this in common: that piece of life they build together inevitably becomes the seed and the root of the best that those 2 persons will leave behind.
Today I heard a song that reminds me of you in a city which name is also yours. We were kids when we met and I'm just happy to know that your life is the one you wanted

Dear...teacher. I knew you were going to be a key person to me. Thank you. You were, but know i´m also thinking of the sadness and the emptiness after my graduation. It would mean a lot to know if you have learned something from me, too. Remember that time when you thanked me for being your student? That words got deep into me. Since then, I've been learning that learning is curing at the same time. And I miss that.But now i also think that you suported me only because i did everything you were expectacting, i always want to be a good student and try to avoid mistakes. I never saw you again, i hope you are still fine now.

Dear lover, I hope we can work it out, because I want to stay with you forever. Love you, and you and even more and before a gentleness for my fears. Let's stay soft together. Kiss you. 

Dear ex roommate,
I still hate you. I still think of the past summer and every bad moment your selfishness caused me. I'm still afraid of going to Sagrada Familia and see your face. I'm still mad you stole from me and I did nothing. get your fucking shit together and deal with your own life instead of shittalking others. seriously, how can it be sooo hard to show any emotionality, and caring gestures? you disguise yourself behind smartass words and intellectual   reasoning of any discussion. i think, i do not even realize how much you reproduce patriarchal structures with making me feel small when being emotionally smart in comparison to you, who is really only smart with words. to be honest, thats no real smartness.

Dear future husband,
I'm sitting here in a sunny room with a dozen of feminists and you're not there. I wonder why but I can't really think of an acceptable reason justifying your absence. Is it because my Feminist comrades and companions show me, just by being here, that a future me without a future you is possible? yes it i possible! We were wrong believing that thing of "half plus half" because each of us is, in fact, only one in a gazillion pieces that we're made of. Universe is waiting for us: let's departure toward a broader life.


Dear grandma,
i am wondering how you are doing with everything, that was going on last year. how you would be doing? what would you say? to me? to the oncles? would you be as suttle as always? or would you finally speak up? 
sometimes i feel like, you were a slowly blooming feminist. more and mire saying no to reproduction work, doing what is best for you and giving a fuck what others, especially your sons would say. but what about now? would you be a feminist? still engaged? If you could live it all again like you said you wanted, would you do it all the same? Would you get your drivers license at 18 so you could drive us around at 90? 

Dear whatever I make you out to be, I wish I knew what it is that keeps me stuck to you. That makes me compare everything with you. With us. With it never having been us. Sometimes I feel like I can trace your silouhette in my memory even though I can barely make it out at all. I wonder about all the words I have tried to find for you. Are they locked Up somewhere? Why every cords I try to break knotted to your heart. The nevers we wrote together haunt my every attemps at something. 

Dear dad, I am forgetting your voice. I spend so much time trying to recall it. Looking at what I have left of you in mp4 files, in bad quality, mostly shaky. I wonder if I really knew you. I wish we talked more honestly with each other. I wish we did not just say what we wanted by playing each other our favorite songs. Can you see me now? From where are you watching? Is it still called watching for you? When my computer suddenly turns on even though I haven't touched it, did you do it? 
I already know you won't be answering this letter in any vulnerable way because you were never able to do so. I've been missing you even when you were alive, because you always felt so far away. 

Dear...death,I hope you take your time very carefully because someone like you shouldn't be making as many mistakes as you do on a daily basis. I believe it's time you engage in a deep introspection process because your carelessness has been painful to us. 
Death you should have some rules... 
Dear death, what is fairness to you? You are with us all the day,  since we are born, we shoud be prepair to sleep with you. Please be gentle. Be gentle for the last dream... Dear death, you are my deepiest nightmare. Is dying to become nothing ou to ecome immortal?  As a dream? Please came as an eternal dream.

Querido...querida, words meaning desire

Dear... friend who is always telling me what I should do, it's not of your business, get a life maybe, it's nice. I don't need to be molded.
Please just don't say what you want to say for once and leave space for me. Why do I always have to try to understand you and why does everything have to revolve around you? Do you listen when you ask and I awnser? I know that you have good intentions, but your tight grip on wanting to control makes it hard to be close to you. 
I hate being told what to do and you knew it, don't act like you don't.

Dear... missed father, who were you for real? so many questions in my head. Love you 
What kind of mysteries can't be solved?
Can you ever fully understand a person?

Dear ghost, have you banned me from your dreams? I thought Midsummer loverS only existed in litterature. Or never. This time is it forever never, or maybe just never forever?Ghosts live among us... they are real but why do they leave us?  Why are summer romances the hardest to get over?
Or do we just unlearn to see you? i wonder, if you are frustrated by me? us? to be honest, you could sometimes do a little better and just speak the fuck up, you know?! Sometimes I wish I could understand this like it was a Ari Aster movie. Like a horror movie I could understand, laugh and scream to.That is another midusummer gone wrong. Why do break-ups with ghosts feel like knives planted in our bodies? I don't want to put you in a pit of fire. I want to burn with you and let our ashes write the love song we could never sing.
Thank you for your visit. I hope we’ll meet again.
Yours truly, a lover from another world.


Dear Grandmother. The other day I woke up feeling dizzy. The days go by so slow. I assumed it was just exhaustion from the last couple of days, the heavy work burden. I went to my kitchen and while waiting for the coffee machine to brew I opened my phone. I was probably trying to open the
the radio app to listen to the morning news, but my tired fingers and sleepy mind opened google maps instead. I realized because i was shocked realizing something ethingwas completely wrong. Somehow the world had turned 45 degrees to the right. Two hours later I went to the building site where my sculpture is being installed. I went to the workers changing rooms to find tthe smallest safety shoes availabe, size 40. I always end up wearing white clothes on the day i get my period or when I coincidentally have to places or spaces where i get dirty. I would describe my outfit that day as "funny games" without gloves though. When i went out to the building site the sun threw my shadow on to the cobblestone pavement and i realized how heavy and big my safety shoed feet were anchored to the ground while the rest of my body was thin and skewed in order to find balance. All day i felt it, how something had turned different but gravity still hadn't callibrated.After sleeping again, everything was normal, or the new turn was already normalized. I wonder if you throughout your long life noticed turns like this?Best regards, your granddaughter 

 Wouliarmy .

Chère colère, Querida raiva, Liebe Zorn, mchit ou jit. Kära ilska, 怒りへ, I hear, I hear, I hear. Here. X

Dear penpal from the other emisphere, can you believe I'm attending a workshop about letter-writing? We got in touch via printed classified ads back in 2000 when I was looking for punk rock friends, right before visiting New Zealand. After a couple of emails we met in your hometown and it was like spending time with a twin sister from another family or even better:

eehe. H ber  


Querido compañero,
thank you for being honest with me. I know it's difficult to ask for help but sometimes two it's better than one, especially if we're trying to find joy, wherever it has gone. Thank you for understanding what happiness meant to me, and how my path was different from yours.It is so sad and I don't know how to handle dispapapointment, I'm just a chChiles dear m, i just saw your double in a bakery. Behind the glass counter, your broad forehead, your black eyes flash at me, but your beard is missing, the humor in the gap between your teeth. She accepted my change with a small thank you, her hands like restless animals, already maneuvering the next dumpling into crispy paper. My mouth is stringy and salty, and I think of how you always cooked without salt because of R.'s illness. The way to the heart is through the stomach, and whenever I add salt without
 tasting it, I thinuof you  
 
 
 Dear me child,
 Are you happy with me? Am I being honest with your dreams and body excitments and choreographs and desires? Should I come back to dancing?
I hope to go beyond your wildest dreams. I hope you're proud of me and what we did together.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Coul you imagined that we would be living accros the ocean?

Yours sincerely,